Co-Parenting During the Holidays
Co-parenting during the holidays may be difficult, but it doesn't have to be. Learn some helpful tips to make the season joyous and avoid undue conflicts with your ex.

November 10, 2011 /24-7PressRelease/ -- Now that Halloween has passed and the costumes and candy have been put away, the holiday season begins in earnest. Divorced and separated parents must now prepare for the most emotional and contentious part of the year. Parents want the best for their children. They want to include kids in family activities and school functions, and they want their children to have experiences that will last a lifetime. However, parents may be too rigid when things go awry.

Family law attorneys agree that the holiday season is the busiest time of year, because of the mountains created from molehill arguments. The following tips can help parents make the most of the holiday season and avoid disagreements.

Know your order - Many divorce decrees and parenting time orders have specific details about where the child is supposed to be during the holidays. It is common for parents to alternate holidays (i.e. Christmas Eve with mom, Christmas Day with dad) or to share each day if the families live within a reasonable distance. Also, court orders have right of first refusal provisions detailing what parents can (and should) do if a parent cannot exercise parenting time because of an emergency or illness. If you know and understand your decree, you should be able to handle unanticipated changes without too much difficulty.

Be flexible - The holiday season is a collection of days and events; which means that you can celebrate when you have the children in your care. This is especially important because you may not get everything you want during the holidays.

For kids, it really doesn't matter what day a holiday falls on, as long as they get to spend time you. In other words, Thanksgiving dinner can still be enjoyed on black Friday (the day after Thanksgiving), and Christmas does not have to be celebrated on December 25th. Children are surprisingly resilient. As long as you're there and show that you care, the holidays will be festive and memorable no matter what day you celebrate.

Compromise is key - The old adage "Peace on Earth, Goodwill to Men" is rooted in compromise. Parents should be willing to set their personal interests aside to promote their children's happiness throughout the year, but it is increasingly important during the holidays. Although he or she may not show it, your ex will be grateful if you compromise on contentious issues.

If a parent is running late because of work demands, be flexible with pickup and drop off times (or locations). Also, be willing to trade parenting days to make sure kids get time with grandparents or other extended family members who don't see them very often. Most importantly, if you have a continuing rift with your ex, set it aside for the holidays. After all, if the Germans and the British could forge a Christmas truce during World War I, so can you. If you focus on creating win-win scenarios, the children will reap the benefits.

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